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« I Remember You, John R. Crowe | Main | Silliness All Around »

Thursday, September 14, 2006

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Hoping

yes there are better books than that! first of all Our Bodies Our Selves is great, but a little before her time, I would suggest "Talking About Sex" A guide for families, "It's Perfectly Normal" by Robie H. Harris and Michael Emberley, "It's So Amazing" by the same Authors. I believe all of these can be found at Amazon or at plannedparenthood.com in the store.

kat

my mother never talked to me about sex growing up, but boy does she now.

SOMEBODY MAKE HER STOP!!!!

There is a teenage version of Our Bodies, Ourselves. It's called Changing Bodies, Changing Lives. I had it growing up and remember it being very good. I can't remember for sure but I think I got it when I was about her age. My mom bought it when I got my period so I think I was about 11 or 12.

Good luck.

Melissa @ Organized Chaos

I'm of no help since my wee ones are all 4 and under, and are still happy with "mommy & daddy made babies" LOL! I just wanted to say that you're scaring me to death (OMG I am going to have 3 teenagers at the same time!) and it really does sound like you're on the right track. PS - Love the pics you've been posting on Flickr! Kudos to you!!

amanda

so interesting. i admire your approach. haha...i think many of us probably can never forget how this topic was broached with us...i was in the car with my mom and had nowhere to go, so i just strunk against the door and probably cried because i didn't want to talk about it.

jenny

How much do you want for the stick figures? I would like the full set, please.

dana

I have three girls. Bought all the books. They hated them... I found them hidden under their beds, shoved under stacks of books, or as far away from them as possible. It seems to me that if you are open and talk about sex, waiting, body changes, respect for themselves and others, they will get it. I respond to them and they seem to find that to be enough.

brandon

thanks! i think you and i are on the same page on this one. in fact, my one selfish motivation in starting sooner rather than later is that my son seems young enough not to be embarrassed by the descriptions.

there's nothing quite like an uncomfortable silence to derail your confidence whilst explaining the many places one can stick a wee-wee.

and thanks for the link to leah. it was a big honor to be interviewed by her, and i've been blown away by the response.

Shelli

This is a tough one and I think that you are right to take your cues from her. I will have to think on the book recommendation. I bet I can get some great suggestions from the pediatricians/nurse practitioners at work, though. I'll ask.

LondonMisfit

This is off topic, but I've just gone through your self portraits, and I'm beyond impressed - they are stunning and so creative. I'll be fascinated to see where this takes you by the end of the project, already the range of perspectives from fun to emotive and evocative to sensual is wonderful.

Shara

My favorite sex talk tactic in my family was orchestrated by my aunt - she had bought my cousin a playstation for xmas, then about 2 months later, gave him a book (might have been the families one referenced earlier - one for kids and parents and encouraging discussion) and took away the playstation until he had read the book and they'd talked about it. I think he was about 12 or 13. Anyhoo, 7 years later he's grown up into a very level-headed, repectful kid who talks to his mom about dating and girls.

Heatherg

I duck the questions and send her to my mom.......... then i bitch about what my mom tells her.

I should really get my shit together and not be such a pansy ass.

kim

wow, i'm glad that day/talk is still far away for me. let's hope for boys so the man can do "the talk" ;)

Clare

My kid is a lot younger, but I hear that the American Girls body book is actually very helpful (The Care & Keeping of You). It doesn't have sex in it, but it's very informative, friendly, and readable about body stuff and includes specific information like exactly how to put in a tampon and stuff like that.

Cindi

I am going to second the Robie Harris collection. My kids have been exposed to them since they were about 5 years old, my now 11 year old would have been lost without the knowledge when her period started just days before her 11th birthday.

In our house there are no taboo subjects, and you know, I love that because my children are comfortable talking about anything and that makes me feel like I am at least doing something right as a parent.

Cindi
http://www.amazon.com/Let-s-Talk-About-Sex/dp/1844281744/sr=8-1/qid=1158338871/ref=pd_bbs_1/102-1865338-8325747?ie=UTF8&s=books

http://www.amazon.com/Perfectly-Normal-Changing-Growing-Sexual/dp/0763624330/ref=pd_bxgy_b_img_b/102-1865338-8325747?ie=UTF8

(I think the first two are the same book, different titles, not sure)

http://www.amazon.com/Amazing-Sperm-Birth-Babies-Families/dp/0763600512/ref=pd_sim_b_2/102-1865338-8325747?ie=UTF8

Cecily

Charlie and I were joking about this the other night. If Tori asks where babies come from we'll say, "well, honey, first the mommy takes a bunch of hormones...then a doctor sticks a needle in her ovaries...then there's a petri dish, and your daddy just has to go to a room with porn..."

jg

Clare is right about "The Care & Keeping of You." It is a VERY good book for young girls. Just puberty/body stuff though - no sex.

Mir

Another vote here for "Care and Keeping of You." It certainly leaves the door on the harder stuff open, so that (ideally) she gets plenty of information but mom is still necessary to answer questions. ;)

sheryl

I also nominate "The Care and Keeping of You"!

Great book, recommended by my foster niece's therapist.

My sister and her partner love it. They have four girls to raise, ages 4-10. The 10 year old is about to hit puberty.

Hoping

I was just looking through your self portraits and they are amazing!

islaya85

I had a book growing up (I'm only 21 now, it wasn't that long ago) called What's Happening To My Body: A book for girls. It was very informative, in the give the facts ways, but didn't just discuss breasts, etc. It was good about covering the basics of the male puberty and talked briefly about sex, if I correctly recall, and even mentioned masturbation (and that it is not an evil thing). I was always able to go to my mom with questions as well, but this was a good place to check if I didn't want to talk about it, or even just as a reference between talks. Plus, some of my friends weren't as fortunate about being able to talk to their parents, and I was able to share the book with them. The illustrations aren't exactly stick figures, but they certainly aren't photographs. And they do help make sense of some of the mechanics that you might assume someone to understand (the first few years after The Talk, I assumed the man had to be on top, due to gravity issues. Guess I missed the blood flow step of the initial explaination. XD).

I applaud your frankness with her though. So many people are puritanical about it, its great to know some kids will be growing up armed with the facts.

Neil

About your self-portraits: They are so beautiful. And for me, they reveal something about you that writing can never do. So many of us don't put photos of us on our blogs, myself including, and I wonder if that presents a lesser picture of who we really are.

How do you set-up the shot? With a timer and tripod?

Amanda

When I was a pre-teen, my mom gave me Changing Bodies, Changing Lives. I pretended not to want to deal with it, but I read it under the covers, by flashlight. It was a great resourse.

Dustin

This is my parenting nightmare.

But you're right, Middle School these days is crazy and getting crazier so kids need all the info. they can handle.

I applaud your openess with your daughter. She's lucky to have that.

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