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Friday, April 14, 2006

Comments

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Jessica

Great post, Sarah - such important points. And can I just say how much I love that girl of yours?!

Closet Metro

Beautiful post.

P.S. You're right - all of the Austin Ladies are beautiful. No photoshop required.

Heather

We women certainly do get on ourselves for a myriad of things, don't we?

Loved the post. It's funny because that post your referring to is something I could probably write every week. It seems like its always something. Why do we do it to ourselves?

And BTW, your daughter rocks. Love her come back!!!

Chickie

It shows that you are teaching her well.

Cecily

It's a tough issue, isn't it? I still stand behind people when I can in photos... sigh.

The kiddo rocks. Stupid boy. First of many, sadly.

Shelli

This is so true. Why are we like this to ourselves. When I recently posted a pic of me on my site and I liked that I was in smaller jeans and everything about my body, I had to comment that my face looked like hell, that I was really tired, etc., etc. It is sad.

kerri anne

You are so beautiful Sar. And this post is awesome. And, ditto what Metro said about the Austin gals.

SandyC

That's good -- bringing women out of the dark ages of self hate one kid at a time!

nick

Missed you on wed.

Love

Nick

Tracy Helgeson

So much of my personality is entwined with my feelings of self-consciousness that I don't know where one ends and the other starts. I have decided to just go with it and stop fighting it so much. However, I have made a monumental effort to not comment on bodies, weight and looks (mine or anyone else's) in front of my daughters. I think that when physical looks are discussed so much, we tend to judge others and ourselves so harshly. So far the girls are supremely self confident and don't disparage their looks or others. Good post, Sarah. Your daughter sounds way cool, and the boy is clearly foolish.

Elise

Oh, man, isn't it heartbreaking to hear a girl ask if she looks fat? I remember the first time I heard my cousin say that - my beautiful ballet-dancer cousin who looks like Mariel Hemingway - I just about died. But the silly thing about it was that this was the story I told myself in my head: "Oh my gosh, I can't believe she is asking if she looks fat. She is gorgeous. Now, me - I do look fat in this!" So I am as guilty of it as everyone else. Curses on this dumb society that thinks women should be fat-free. And curses on how hard it is to lose weight. I'm up 15 pounds since the summer. GRRRRRRRR. So what did I do tonight when I got home? Ate a piece of cold pizza after having a full dinner. Nice.

Meg

What a beautiful post, Sarah. I actually remember trying to train myself to hate my body, since clearly that would be how the popular girls would like me. I punished myself for not minding that I was big until I minded. Ugh.

Your girl kicks ass. And so do you.

Sheri

I loved this post, you are such a good writer and mom.

Susan

I only hope that I can raise my daughters to be as poised as your young lady sounds. You are doing a terrific job.

Leggy

Good post. S. rocks and so does her mom. I find that my son has self-doubt issues as well and it worries me a lot. Its hard as a parent to know how much of that is normal and when to worry about it. And like you, I want to try to fix it, or I take responsibility for it when I should probably step back a bit.

sandra

Sounds like you're doing a great job instilling a sense of self-confidence in your daughter. I often wish I could go back to the mid-elementary school days, when I could have given a rat's ass less about how my butt looked in jeans.

TCho

I just recently broke up with a guy. It hurts a lot because all of a sudden he just didn't seem to care about me. All my friends tell me that it's his loss, and I while I believe it, I wish I would stop thinking about him and hoping that he'll come around.

mihow

Awwww, Tobyjoe, I mean Matt, will take her to any future school dances!

Dustin

Wow. True insight on really hard topic. You are right that guys go through this too, but sometimes in ways that are more subtle or just not recognized for what they are. Why do our children feel so pressured to be other than themselves at such young ages? Truly sad.

Amanda B.

I love, LOVE this post. I wish you had been my Mommy. :D

jenny

Just agreeing with all the above commentators who are right on in saying that you're raising your daughter to be a strong woman. Self-esteem is the greatest gift you can give a child.

brandon

i just need to disagree with jenny (again). technically, an xBox 360 is the greatest gift you can give a child. self-esteem is number 4. i asked my son last night, and he told me.

hooizz

interesting thoughts about photographical self consciousness. i take ALOT of photos, and i definitely agree that 'looking good' is paramount when it comes to sharing photographs. ESPECIALLY in the day and age of online photoblogs, and free photosites (flickr, buzznet etc.). how can it not be important - we live in a day and age where people can pore over an online photo from every angle. they can re-examine. they can zoom in. they can spend minutes, hours, days looking at and examining a snapshot (creepy but true)... and inevitably they will make a judgement about us/you/me (even if they dont know anything about us/you/me, or the context of the situation that the picture is taken in).

not to sound like a broken record, but it sorta makes me think of match.com. ha!

i touched on this topic briefly in this post: (http://hooizz.blogspot.com/2005/06/is-it-everything.html). take a quick look if you get a chance.

cheers
hooizz

PS - your daughters 'boyfriend' experience reminds me of the scene in 'stepmom'. if only life was like the movies... and julia roberts was my mom. hahahh

MainlineMom

beautiful post. my mom screwed up my self-esteem/body image and I pray I never do the same to my kids. found you via brando.

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